From the Melville Cat:
I’m writing this post as a favor to Heather. She’s been trying to write it for days — I’ve been watching her — but today she gave up and asked me to do it for her.
Unlike my usual light-hearted feline musings, this is a serious post indeed. Ray does not live in our house anymore.
Heather says it’s a breakup. I wasn’t familiar with this term before and I still don’t understand completely, as nothing is broken as far as I can see. I never saw any pieces of glass on the floor — something I always make sure to scamper away from. I don’t see any cracks in the furniture.
All I know is, there used to be three of us and now there are two.
A breakup? What exactly do you mean?
It was confusing at first. Heather went away on a trip — she was already sad before she left — and while she was gone Ray carried some things out of the house. He seemed sad, too.
On one particular morning during this time, Ray was very sad indeed. He carried some more things out of the house. I followed him to his car and watched. When Ray finished carrying his things, he pet me and played with me for a very long time.
Finally Ray said goodbye and drove away.
Hours later, long after dark, I heard a car. I knew it would be Heather. I stood at the door, meowing (it was past my dinner time!), and followed Heather inside. As soon as she opened the door she began to cry.
I followed Heather from room to room, meowing while she cried. (Dinner time. Remember?) She sat on the edge of the bed and I sat on the floor, facing her. I kept meowing, not so much because I was hungry anymore but because I didn’t know what else to do. Maybe if I keep meowing, I thought, Heather will stop crying.
Heather stood up, rubbed my head, and went to the kitchen to fix my dinner.
It was then, as I was eating my dinner (finally!), that Heather told me about the breakup. I understood. Ray is not coming back.
It took me a long time to get used to living with Ray. I confess I made life quite difficult for him early in our relationship. But he worked hard to gain my affection, feeding me catnip and tasty packets of moist, meaty morsels that Heather never fed me before. I grew quite fond of Ray eventually.
Now he is gone. Because of this breakup where nothing actually breaks. At least nothing I can see.
It’s a pity.
Life With a Crazy Cat Lady
As for Heather, I know just how to deal with her. I’ve helped Heather through hard times before, when Jon died. Caring for her has always been my most important job — after taking care of myself, of course.
I’m sticking close to Heather during this difficult time. Although the weather has grown warm I still spend my nights indoors, sleeping faithfully at the foot of the bed.
When Heather wakes up during the night, which happens often, she reaches down to pet me and I always give her a reassuring squeak. She still seems very sad. But I’m sure she’ll be back to normal soon.
Fortunately Heather has decided to continue Ray’s habit of feeding me packets of moist, meaty morsels for dinner. For this I am grateful.
Heather says now she can now fulfill her true destiny to become a Crazy Cat Lady.
Crazy Cat Lady? I wasn’t familiar with this term, either.
Despite my best efforts to communicate that I was not in the mood for selfies, Heather insisted. How rude. But I guess that’s what Crazy Cat Ladies do.
I think I’m beginning to understand.
I read your blog every week and it makes me homesick for I am in London and used to live in SA. It does make me smile, or as of now a little sad. There is a terrific article about South Africa’s boxing grannies which may cheer you up https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EhBHK6-Fufk
I just heard about these ladies last week! I need to go check them out. Thanks for the video — it did indeed improve my day.
Love and hugs
Thanks Timmee.
Sorry about the breakup. A new chapter begins in your life…
Thanks 🙂
Sorry about the breakup. However this was written so well…I very nearly DID think it was the cat writing it. ????
What do you mean by that. I DID write it ????
Haha. Very creative kitty. Sending lots of hugs
Thanks ????
Hey Heather. I’m sad you are going through this; I’ve been there ….
A big hug
Margaret
(Currently in Marblehead MA next tochoppy ocean and in the blustery remnants of Jose)
Hope to see you soon when I’m back in sunny Jozi
Hi Margaret, thanks for the message and I hope all is well in Mass. I guess we’ve all been there at one point or another. Thanks for the support and hope to see you soon. x
I’m sure you have, Heather but if you haven’t, I’d recommend a swift read through of The Little Prince.
Somehow it always talks to me about love and loss.
I’m glad you have your feline friend !
Wow, it’s been about 30 years since I read that and I think it was in French. Which means I remember absolutely nothing about it. I’ll find a copy 🙂
Sorry to hear this.. very sad.. for everyone, mostly for you Heather. But you will survive and being a crazy cat lady is actually a wonderful thing to be… especially with such a wonderful cat… thanks for finding such a special way of sharing the story. Hope it makes you feel better and supported.
Thanks Anriette. And who am I kidding, anyway? I became a crazy cat lady long ago 🙂
I love this, the way the Melville cat puts it, is sad yet one can almost feel the real comfort you are giving Heather. Maybe a book written by you the Melville Cat will ensure total healing for Heather.
I think the Melville Cat’s book-writing day is drawing closer…
Good job, MC. You are doing all the right things. Take good care of Heather and also yourself.
But look out. Crazy Cat Lady means you will be getting at least one new roommate. A feline one. HIIIISSSS.
Give Heather a nice head butt for me. Her heart is broken on the inside, and unlike a broken glass, she can’t get a new one. It’ll take a little time — or maybe a lot of time — to heal.
But at least she won’t have to clean up after him anymore?
I have noticed that the house is much cleaner lately…
You take your silver linings where you can. Things to look forward to: not shaving your legs, not shaving your armpits, eating all the garlic…
Yes yes yes.
And growing even stronger and wiser!
????
You are both looking very well all the same – lovely pictures????
Thank you!
Thinking of you!! It’s a kak thing, and takes time. Also just a little harder (and on the flip side better) when it’s something you have shared with a large group of near strangers. Been there!
Haha, yes that’s true. Blogging is a blessing and a curse in this regard. But I’m lucky to have a cat who writes very well about these things.
Hi there Melville kitty! You write so well! Especially for someone with claws…..so hard to type. I am sure you will do everything you can to help Heather while you write your book…..and do write it!
I hate to mention it, but you might want to discourage the Cat Lady thing….that usually means, ahem!, multiple cats. Somehow, I think you are Top Cat and you’d like to keep it that way. (Well, maybe one other young ‘un you can boss around?)
Anyway, give Heather some special purrs and tell here this US reader just loves her blog, especially the positive, chipper tone she usually has about Jhb….I usually hear some pretty gloomy stuff from SA expats here.
Thank you Brenda. I will tell her. Surely she will NOT be that kind of cat lady. I am indeed born to be a solo cat.
To MC: Sandy Paws (she refuses to type herself…) says she wanted me to convey her sorrow for both you and Heather. Me Too. M 🙁
Thank you Sandy Paws! I will relay the message ????
Dear Melville cat, thanks for letting me know about Ray leaving. I feel badly for Heather. Give her my love and a few extra licks, and tell her “this too shall pass”.
Ellen
Thank you, Auntie Ellen. xoxo
Sometimes the best stories come out of the worst breakups. I guess I’m thinking Abba and their songs after, not sure why that’s the first thing that comes to mind. The Melville Cat put this really well and I know you’ll bounce back. But first it’s time to be sad. I’m sorry!
Thanks Sine. Maybe the Melville Cat will become a songwriter.
That sounds very possible! I’ll be waiting for his first release.
Sorry about the difficult times. Melville cat, I am glad you are taking good care of Heather. Hugs to you both.
Thanks Kelly. xx
???? sorry to hear this pusthycat leddi….
Thanks MC. Sometimes life is like your raspy tongue – means well but is very rough at times. But does what it needs to. Hugs.
That’s very true. Rough tongues can be okay sometimes 🙂
So sorry to read about your breakup Heather, but look on the bright side…..much more time to spend with the beautiful Mellville cat and no more cleaning up after a man and all the woes that go along with being in a relationship. I’ve been single for 4 years now which has meant 4 beautiful dedicated years to my x 4 feline companions (used to be 5 but sadly Lucky girl passed in January 2016). Many people are in and out of relationships throughout their lifetime and heartache is sad at first but you will feel better with each day that passes. Live life for yourself, be happy and enjoy the single life. It can be very rewarding. Hugs to you and your precious cat xoxo
Thanks so much Maureen. I’ve certainly been there before…just takes a bit of an attitude adjustment 🙂
I don’t even know you and I’m sad for you, Heather. Glad you still have TheMelvilleCat to be your pal
Sending warmest wishes from Chicago,
Nancy
Thank you 🙂
I am so glad Heather has you to ease her passage through this part of her journey. So Mr Melville Cat, King of Melville and Lord of all Cats in the Universe, please be extra nice to Heather, not too aloof and tolerate lots of cuddles from her. Just for a while. XXX
I will do that. Meow.
Oh Heather, I’m sorry to hear about this 🙁 New chapter, new start, and all that jazz. You’re a strong woman who I know will be just fine. If not now, soon 🙂 xx
Thanks Jaina ❤️
Just wanted to tell you that you have been on my mind a lot these past few days even though we have never met, I feel that I do know you in a way, and the Melville cat as well, after following your blog for so many years….life brings us good times and not so good times, as you well know, keep on exploring and happiness will visit you again soon.Hugs from an unknown friend in Geneva.
Thank you so much Catherine ❤️
Am sad about the break up,Kitty please take good care of Heather for me. Sending many hugs
Thank you Shasha. I will.
Love to you both ❤️????❤️
Thanks Paula ????
I wish was there for you like you’ve always been there for me❤
Oh Flo, I wish that too! ????
Ugh. Sorry I missed such an important post. And what a clever way to do it.
Ahhh, breakups. What hasn’t been said that has been said before?
You’ll live.
Hmmm. Ever so gentle, Lani.
One day at a time.
As opposed to???
Go out there and get yourself some booty?
xxoo
Hahahaha. I’m on board with all of those except for the last one ????
Well…never try, never know! 😀
Breakups are always painful. This is a post written from the viewpoint of a cat, brilliantly showing the way the cat sees the world and the way they can give us comfort, the way they sense our emotions. Every time I’m sad, I look at my cats, and the day gets brighter.
Cats are definitely helpful during sad times 🙂
I loved this!
Sending so much of love, Heather. Break ups are the worst. May you heal, and your heart too. X
Thanks so much, Babalwa 🙂